have you ever felt surrounded by people but it’s just… empty?
they laugh. they have fun.
but the second i appear…
cricket noise.
they say they love me
but i can’t feel it.
not the way it used to be, not the way it should.
i know i’m different.
but does that mean i don’t deserve to feel genuinely loved?
i saw a glimpse of us..
just like joji said.
you used to hold space for me.
but the moment something more exciting came along,
you threw me into the dark.
and suddenly, i’m a side character
in my own damn storyline.
i try to speak up
but they say i’m too dramatic.
too sensitive.
but i’m the one who felt the shift.
i’m the one holding it all up with duct tape.
i just miss the days.
the sleepless nights, the endless laughs.
i miss the version of us that felt safe.
i miss the promise…
“don’t change.”
i never changed.
you all did.
but maybe i should still be grateful.
grateful to be watching you all behind the glass.
at least someone is happy.
and i’m okay with that.